Worst Ad Campaign of 2007

WINNER:  Burger King

REASON:

As if the bobble-headed mascot ripped from a Lewis Carroll nightmare wasn’t creepy enough.  This year, the King insults and devalues both it’s employees and it’s consumers.  It began with the P.Diddy advert that was supposed to illustrate that the fast food chain is now “open later for you.”  I haven’t had it my way since I saw this vile excuse for a commercial that extols the benefits of the privileged over that of the employees(who are relegated to the role of servants locked in the building until the owner turns them and the lights on with the clapper).  BK followed that pile of ignorance with the Soccer Mom King Killer bits that simply do not work on any level and then ends the year by “punking” it’s customers and filming their rabid reactions.

SOLUTION:

Find a new ad team.  Now.  I want to come back and get fat off your food.  I like your crispier, more potatoey fries and the fact that you have onion rings.  The simple description of the Quad Stacker, “Meat, cheese, meat, cheese, bacon.  Meat, cheese, meat, cheese, bacon.”  That was all the food erotica I needed to hear and I was there.  Focus on the product, bring back the food wars, whatever.  There’s enough YouTube douchebaggery out there already.  Stop demeaning people and promote the product.

RUNNER UP:  Taco Bell

REASON:

I’ll give “The Bell” a kudo for having the big brass shiny ones for introducing the concept of “Fourth Meal” on the eve of the era before “Big Food” is hauled into court for force feeding us into the grave but come on, just call it “Munchy Time,” or “Drunk Grub.”  That’s the target demo anyway.

SOLUTION:

Try, try again?  Demolition Man 2?  Hire interns and give them something medicinal.  It matters not, just find something else before someone else gets stuck in the drive through window.

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